billhamp 
September 24, 2012Let’s start off light and easy this week. As we know, however, good things often come in small packages and this my friends is a good one.
It’s simple but so powerful.
Ready?. . .
Change your “but” to “and”.
That’s all.
I love you but you’re really irritating me.
I think you did a good job but you should change up that presentation next time.
You’re a good kid but your temper is really causing problems.
Now let’s change it up. . .
I love you. And. . .that’s really irritating me.
I think you did a good job. And. . .you should change up that presentation next time.
You’re a good kid. And. . . your temper is really causing problems.
2 distinct statements which is exactly what these should be. Each statement should stand on it’s own. “And” makes this possible. In fact, you really don’t even need the “And”. You could drop it all together, I guess it just helps it flow.
Think about this today. Trust me. .. you will have plenty of chances to try it.
when “but” is used it negates the compliment, and will make “you’re a good kid”…..negative…..
That’s right. “But” tends to negate the comment made prior to it. “and” fixes that.
I love it. It’s strange how much words affect those around us and how easy it is to overlook the way we make people feel. It’s so easy to forget that… Thanks for the tip! I’m going to give it a shot.
thanks for the comment Chris. Words ARE powerful. I’ve been working on this for a while and rarely use “but” anymore. go for it!